Falling behind
A blog about growing up watching everyone around you fall in love while you seem to fall behind. (laufey reference;))
Imagine a world where your best friend´s get asked out constantly and getting compliment´s from left and right, all the attention you´d only dream of having. That´s mine and many other´s reality.
Growing up like this, to be honest, does definitely alter something in you´re brain. It feels so isolating and literally makes you think everything is wrong with you. You notice how every song is about a love story or a heartbreak. It sound´s crazy to admit, but i´d love to experience a heartbreak. I aknowledged the relationship issues that can accure and all the fights that you can get into, but to be fair , it´s so much better than feeling so unloved.
What im wondering is…does everyone actually find the one or do they settle for anyone slightly attractive just to not be alone? Im constantly debating wether my standard´s are too high based on my looks, if its my personality or just the city i live in. It can truly get so lonely and i think that´s something that makes people bitter. I mean nobody wants to die alone right? -Ofcourse not. I would love to know if there actually is someone out there for me that would listen to me yap and yap about my boring day, every day. Someone that would shower me when im too weak to. It just feels so out of reach.
Growing up with no romantic experience also has alot of consequences as developing: anxious attachment style, awkwardness, emotional unavailability, people-pleasing, fear of intimacy, trus issues. This is something you can´t even avoid because its not in your hands. It´s in the hands of whoever is up there .
“The right one will come, don´t you worry”
Oh how ironic that you get a new boyfriend every other week. It´s easy to say that when you have so many options. My only option is the 15 y/o guy that doesn´t shower. Don´t we forget the prank of being asked out by the popular guy in your class. What can i say, canon event as a hopeless romantic.
I kinda got carried away here, but what im trying to say is that sometimes you have to suffer in the cause of something you cant really control nor influence , while for others it comes naturally. It makes adult relationships much harder to handle. Break-ups too. Kinda like you rolling down a mountain while everyone around you get´s a aerial lift to the top.
Nonetheless, dont forget love can be many other forms than romantic , as in platonic love. Many people forget how important platonic love is (especially if you relate to this blog) just imagine your wedding without bridesmaids….yeah not so cool.
I love youuu
